Review: Haywire

A somewhat simple, cookie-cutter action thriller but with enough style and a strong female protagonist to make it unique.

Haywire follows the story of Mallory Kane, a black ops undercover operative working for the Government, when her life it turned upside down after being betrayed by those around her.

The film is extremely simple, you have probably watched it before but in a different guise; undercover mission goes bad, corruption, framed for murder, cat-and-mouse chase, looking for answers. There is very little in the narrative to make Haywire stand out, in fact, it takes things so easily that you might imagine more going on than there actually is!

But the film show-cases newcomer lead actress Gina Carano as an extremely capable actor and physical fighter; the film is loaded with close combat duels and brawls that show off her abilities. Maybe not on the grand scale of The Raid, but no less impressive.
Director Steven Soderbergh brings his usual smart sophistication that made his Ocean's Eleven film so successful; the film is moody and often morose, quiet and lending itself to musical accompaniment. (Having said that, all of the fight scenes are without music, adding to their pressure) The music... will be a love it or hate it deal, I will admit it took some getting used to as it felt very out of place at times.

But, despite its flaws it has a great supporting cast: Ewan McGregor, Channing Tatum, Antonio Banderas, Michael Douglas and Michael Fassbender, as well as a strong and independent woman in the leading role.
Have some spare time, enjoy action/thriller films? Give Haywire a go.

Review: The Expendables 2

The Expendables was the definition of "damp squib", underwhelming and not even respectful of the old action movies. However the sequel... as surprising as it sounds... was actually pretty fun!

The sequel acts well as a standalone feature since I couldn't remember anything of the first film. Sly Stallone's mercenary team is seen rescuing a Chinese delegate and... Arnold Schwarzenegger's character... in an exciting vehicular attack on an occupied city. However their next mission proves to be even more challenging.

It feels more like a proper testimony to the classic action movies; each actor gets a signature fight or moment, reminiscing glory days and the action is far more eye-catching and creative this time around. The bonus comes from having Van Damme as the villain, while he may not do very much, at least he has some charisma and memorable moments.
I was also impressed that the writing was actually better, in that the comedy was actually fun and not devastatingly dull. It feels like they are enjoying themselves and not wallowing in "we're too old for this" dialogue.

Drawbacks. Well, I was sad to see Jet Li dropping out so early on (he was easily the best part of the first film) and Bruce Willis and Schwarzenegger seem to have limited screen time again so the film can focus on the original team. Slightly disappointing, but the finale has some great moments with those two: "My shoe's bigger than this car!"
The storyline is paper thin and transparent, the film only lasts an hour and a half (with some rather dodgy editing) but this isn't anything unexpected!

It is big and very dumb, but at least memorable. It is a constant gun battle, leaping from one set piece to the next, rarely catching a breath. It is a testimony, like Grindhouse and Black Dynamite, it is entertainment.

Additional Marshmallows: Great to see a film that is actually... violent! There's blood splattering everywhere, people getting stabbed, cut and shot to ribbons! If anything The Expendables 2 is worth watching just for that, in this 12A infested age.

Saga Review: James Bond (No.8 - No.14)

That's right, with Skyfall releasing later this year I am opting to give you my thoughts on all of the Bond films! There's twenty-two films, and when I started this challenge there were twenty-two weeks before Skyfall, sounds good to me!
I grew up in the six year drought of Bond films, between the Dalton and Brosnen Eras, so my definition of Bond is Timothy Dalton in The Living Daylights and License to Kill, while Goldeneye is one of my top favourites. It took me a little while to watch all of the other James Bond films, but they were regularly shown on television, and while the Brosnen films quickly worsened I would never grow to like the Roger Moore era. At least not yet.

Because there are twenty-two films I am breaking my reviews down into eras as best I can. 

Today's post is one of torment, a torturous month and a half of hammed up comedy and glaringly bad storytelling. There is little salvation for me here, people have said I am a fool for doing this, but I will endure... I will.

So let's see what nonsense we are mercilessly subjected to, the dimwitted Texas Sheriffs, the hovercraft gondolas, the brainless bimbos and of course... the skiing.

Live and Let Die (1973)

The first instalment of the Roger Moore era is actually one of my favourites (you have to like the poster with the tarot card theme) despite my general dislike of the other Moore films.

Bond is back with a confident new face as he tracks down a heroin merchant who relies on voodoo witchcraft and fortune telling mysticism. Can Bond survive on his wits alone when surrounded by enemies? By now we know the answer to that!

 It is an unusual turn for the Bond character; the film starts out awkwardly and clustered with multiple locations and scenes, while Bond himself seems a little too oblivious to being followed and walking into traps. I found myself wondering how he got to be a secret agent!

But then the bad guys are numerous, they all have gadgets and spy equipment, and last but not least, a seer of the future! I think I enjoy Live and Let Die because of its unique themes and villains; Solitaire is a good Bond Girl, Baron Samedi is visually striking and unforgettable, and there’s a big guy with a metal claw! But despite all of this, it goes along at a reasonable pace (it doesn’t blaze along like Diamonds for example) the villains are composed and devious.

There are some detour chase sequences, and while they are fun, the airplane chase felt unnecessary and the boat chase was extended with a weird local Sherriff joining in. I think I understood the gag of having local police finally questioning Bond tearing stuff up, but it didn’t work so well in this instance; you could have edited him out, shortened the chase, and it would have been just as good.

But despite these criticisms, I enjoy this one. The themes used, the villains, it feels packed. Not to mention a great theme song.

It is a shame Moore’s initial success didn’t last though...

The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)

Well it continues to surprise me how quickly the Moore films become campy holocausts, but here we are. The Man with the Golden Gun isn’t so much bad as it is disappointing.

James Bond is taken off assignment when a hit is placed on him by a sharp-shooter assassin known as Scaramanga. The undeterred Bond decides beat him to it, and track down the “Man with the Golden Gun” first.

It is Bond versus Dracula now; Christopher Lee plays an excellent part as Scaramanga, memorable with calculating ambition, and a desire to kill Bond simply because it would be good sport. The story is simple and has great potential; I was almost convinced early on that this Moore film would be another surprise.

That is until Mary Goodnight appears... A Bond girl who is as stupid as a Crystal Maze contestant (obscure 1990s British television joke, I couldn’t resist) and quite possibly the STUPIDEST agent of the MI6 ever. How she is a “Secret Agent” is beyond me... activating the doomsday laser cannon with her butt? Just makes me want to claw my eyes out.
Plus, there is a return of the Texas Sherriff “J.W. Pepper” from Live and Let Die because... he was such a hoot right? Ugh.
Plus, how exactly does one decide not to kill Bond, and instead put him into a karate school and be pampered by three Chinese girls where he can easily be rescued?

Overall, so much potential squandered here, making it pretty bland and forgettable – especially after Live and Let Die. Oh, and it has Bond fighting a midget too... really?

The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)

I’m impressed; this is a Moore Bond film that is trying to be more mature! Mostly.

The film opens with perhaps one of the most famous scenes, where Bond skis off a mountain only to open a parachute with the Union Jack flag over it. So begins a story about the United Kingdom rescuing both America and Russia from a criminal mastermind, so very fantastic. Bond must defend himself against a towering mercenary with steel plated teeth, side with Russian secret agent Triple X and stop a man’s plan to capture nuclear submarines.

Compared to the Texas sheriffs, midget fights and brainless bimbos, this film actually becomes quite severe, the plot reminds me of the lacklustre You Only Live Twice, with Blofeld’s abduction of space craft and a final siege on an enemy’s stronghold. Even our Bond girl, Agent Triple X (not to be confused with Vin Diesel...) aka Anya Amasova, is good although her initial hatred for Bond and reluctance of working with him seems to vanish rather easily.

I’d probably say that Jaws himself was the most peculiar element here... but he certainly is monstrous and is the template for future titanic bond henchmen in the future. I also find it a little ironic that Bond’s car turns into a submarine when the villain’s schemes revolve around a new piece of technology that specifically detects submarines.

It also has silly, silly late-70s music. Oh dear god, if only this film had better music accompanying the traditional themes, it might have been nearly perfect. The given effect sounds like someone poking a cat made of jelly, awful!

I was happy to see the campy Roger Moore-ness dialled down a little here though, keeping the humour down to occasion and one-liners. It has a more refined feel, making it one of the more iconic Bond films. Who’d have thought!?

Moonraker (1979)

Bond goes boldly where no Bond has gone before... and hopefully never will again.

When a special American space shuttle goes missing on its way to Britain, it is up to James Bond to track it down. He quickly discovers that the shuttles creator, Drax, has disastrous plans of a global scale.

You know... I hate this film? James Bond has had a lot of ups and downs so far, but Moonraker has to be crowning jewel of utter shame to the franchise. From the word go, there is little to be excited about, the opening scene shows a return of Jaws... why? No particular reason, he just appears, because the fans loved him, and so that Moonraker can ruin his monstrousness with campy stupidly later on.

What kills this film – to my shock – is not the utterly laughable spacesuit laser battle in Earth’s orbit, oh no, a string of contrived plot conveniences kills it before the finale. The entire middle hour of this film is redundant with random fight/chase scenes; we have Bond visiting every corner of the Earth for forgettable reasons, including Venice. While there he rides a gondola (doesn’t everyone?) only for a funeral gondola to pass by nonchalantly... oh snap! There’s a knife-throwing assassin in the coffin! What? No reason. The assassin kills the gondolier first (?) and Bond activates not only a motor, but a full blown hovercraft device! ...
I... I’m sorry, this was a regular gondola, yes? I knew there was a stupid space battle later, but this just blew my mind. They even loop the footage to make a pigeon (A PIGEON!) do a double-take at the... hover-gondola.
I try not to go on tangents like this, but sometimes it is necessary when the shark is jumped so completely like this!

Moonraker is a spoof, a parody of James Bond. Knife-throwing-coffin-gondola-assassins, double-take Pigeons, Jaws-and-girlfriend, Close Encounters of the Third Kind music cues, James Bond dressed as if in a Clint Eastwood Spaghetti Western only to be shown laser guns by Q... The list of awfulness goes on, and on, and on.

I was so bored, and made stupider, watching this. Even Drax’s plan felt redundant in its over-the-topness; there’s no chance it could be allowed to succeed. The setup was garbage too; Bond is called in because Drax stole one of his own shuttles?? I know Blofeld was stupid... but this is taking the cake. Just ask for it back, you moron!

Moonraker is utterly pointless, and bereft of any substance.

Additional Marshmallows: “Moonraker is a special space shuttle as it can launch by rocket and land like a conventional aircraft.”... Uhm, couldn’t all space shuttles do that?

For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Some furious backpedalling from the ghastly “comedy” of Moonraker does little to disguise this film’s lacking conviction.

James Bond is called in when a ship sinks while carrying the A.T.A.C device, a communications computer that can order all the British submarines to fire ballistic missiles. Bond is joined by a woman seeking revenge after the deaths of her parents, and they both begin a perilous mission to find the device before the Russians.

You know I had to go back to the beginning of the film to remind myself why the A.T.A.C was important and what it did? That’s how seemingly irrelevant it becomes twenty minutes into the film. We get a half-baked revenge plot for the very capable Bond Girl Melina, and while the film even began with a throw-away (pun intended) end to Blofeld and even Bond visiting his wife’s grave, it does not capitalise on this relationship synergy between Bond and Melina. The plot feels garbled and extended beyond its scope, making you wonder “Why didn’t they just do that?” whenever scenic detours take place.

So what is there? For a Roger Moore film it has some great stunt work, and some decent underwater sequences that don’t feel overused or slow, an effective car chase down a winding hillside and a great Bond Girl.

I do feel there’s some Bond clichés settling in now... I already stated in my On Her Majesty’s Secret Service review how it felt like Bond at the Winter Olympics, well here they brazenly have scenes taking place at the Winter Olympic stadiums! Yep, ice skating, bobsleigh, ski jump, etc. They really do love their winter sports... but it is starting to get old now. That entire segment of the film felt completely unnecessary, and did I see Bond get attacked by evil ice hockey players, really?

It could have been an hour long, let alone two; it is pretty forgettable...

Octopussy (1983)

Octopussy. That is all.

Seriously, I’m getting really tired of the Moore era now. How such over-the-top nonsense be so forgettable, formulaic and dull is beyond me, I couldn’t even figure this film’s plot (yes, even worse than with the last outing For Your Eyes Only!)

So, a secret agent is killed and a precious Faberge Egg is stolen, leading Bond to a mysterious smuggler known only as Octopussy. Meanwhile, on a complete tangent, a transparently evil Russian General plans to use this smuggler’s actions as a cover for a nuclear strike against NATO.

Apparently, and I just don’t care anymore.

This film is more of an adventure film than a spy film; physical stunts are thrown around left-right-and-centre (suppose I should be grateful there’s no skiing this time!) There is a singular fun moment where Bond is trying to outbid the villains for the Faberge Egg at auction early on, which got a chuckle.

But this rest is so much irrelevance and I guarantee you I won’t remember any of it tomorrow. The puns are out in force, especially during a car chase in the first act, my god it is Batman and Robin standards of puns-per-second (pps) there. We see Bond in an alligator suit... a monkey suit and a clown suit. Oh ho ho, so hilarious. We even get Q flying a Union Jack hot air balloon over the villain’s hideout, because you know... SUBTLE. Good way for the MI6 inventor to get shot in the face! Why? Oh, just so Bond can say “You’re full of hot air” to Q... which doesn’t even make sense.

Moonraker is just awful in many ways, but Octopussy is surely the campiest and shoddiest entry so far, the series is parodying itself now (if it wasn’t already). Easily the worst villain ever written, I mean Drax was an idiot, but General Orlov has no purpose other than he’s EVIL.

People have said this is very Indiana Jones style (oh yeah, he swings on jungle vines with a Tarzan roar too...) and one wonders if, two years after Raiders of the Lost Ark, if Octopussy took some of the Indiana fight scenarios?

I... I want this Moore series to stop, but it is unending! Why did people want more of this tripe? I know it will get better, that I am nearly out of it, but my god it is torturous.

Additional Marshmallows: Maud Adams, who plays Octopussy, is a returning actress who also featured in Man with the Golden Gun (and later uncredited in A View to a Kill)

A View to a Kill (1985)

Usually a final outing for a Bond star is a shallow, flailing mess, but amazingly Moore’s last entry proves to be his best!

When a new microchip is manufactured to survive the EMP blast from a nuclear explosion, MI6 discover the Russians have made an exact copy with help from Max Zorin, head of Zorin Industries. Upon investigation, Bond discovers Zorin is a lot more than he appears.

So the film starts with.... skiing.

For GOODNESS SAKE! STOP WITH THE SKIING! It’s not as long winded as previous sequences, its conclusion is hammed up, but it leads into the excellent 1980s sound of the “A View to a Kill” theme.

The film benefits from strong villains and a strong storyline. Christopher Walken is a great choice for the snide, plotting but psychotic Max Zorin, finally giving this Bond an intelligent and extremely ruthless opponent. There are some nasty executions in this film. Meanwhile Grace Jones turns the tables on the Bond Girl image, playing a great femme fatale role.
There are even some really intense moments, specifically Bond trapped in a burning elevator shaft, and the total lack of comedy and gormless bystanders in these moments is remarkable!

So what’s wrong with it? Well despite distancing itself, there are still Moore-ish moments. The other Bond Girls are pretty unbearable, specifically Tanya Roberts as Stacey, I’m pretty sure her only purpose was to make sure the film ended in stereotypical Moore fashion: “Oh James!”
The villains also have their stupid moments; they could easily kill off Bond, but don’t. However, watch as many Bond as I have now... and these arguments are virtually invalid!

Honestly, with some script tweaks, I’d have loved to see Timothy Dalton start his Bond career on this film, but as it stands (weirdly) it is one of my favourites, despite some flaws.

Additional Marshmallows: This isn’t only Moore’s last film, but also Lois Maxwell’s, the original Miss Moneypenny. There was a thought she would later play the new M character, only for the producer Albert Brocolli to turn it down. He didn’t think audiences would want Bond taking orders from a woman.... How times change.

You have no idea how happy I am to be out of this Bond era. Okay, I know there are other bad ones to come, one in particular I dread as much as Moonraker... but at least it won't be as consistent!

I don't know what possessed everyone to like the Roger Moore films, because obviously the comedy angle worked... but looking back at it most of his films are simple parody! As if they had decided "we can't be as good as the Connery years, so let's not even try!"

While Live and Let Die and A View to a Kill are actually really good and memorable, they don't excuse five other forgettable and often hideous films!

Luckily, I have my generation of Bond coming up next! Timothy Dalton was the first Bond I ever knew, and it pains me to reminisce how he only got two films... Oh well!

Next time it is The Living Daylights and Licence to Kill!  Awesome!

Here are my reviews for the previous Bond eras!

The Connery Era

The Lazenby / Connery Transition

Review: Puss in Boots

There is still a gulf between Dreamworks quality and Pixar quality, (excluding How to Train Your Dragon, of course) but Puss in Boots leaves the crumbling nonsense of the Shrek series and makes something of itself.

Puss In Boots is a prequel to the Shrek films and follows the loveable feline rogue as he seeks to redeem himself in the eyes of his home town after one of his old friend Humpty Dumpty's money making schemes goes wrong. Teaming up with Humpty once more and Kitty Soft-Paws, he is in for an all new adventure.

Puss in Boots is a short and relatively unsurprising story, at least I wasn't any particularly fascinating plot... but then I wasn't looking for that. This is a kids film with just enough creativity and entertainment value to keep adult audiences at least watching it, which is a lot to come from the Shrek franchise.
Can you tell I don't like the Shrek series?

Puss in Boots easily stole the show in Shrek 2, and felt wasted in the third (what didn't feel wasted? I felt wasted watching that!) and fortunately his spin-off has succeeded, proving the character was not only good by proxy of other airhead characters.
Humpty Dumpty may not have been likeable at any point, making his fate more than a little self evident, and Kitty was simply the feisty love interest you would expect. Salma Hayek and Antonio Banderas? Hm, where have I seen this film before...!

But, it is a good romp with some great cat related jokes and creative fairytale references (good to see Dreamworks hasn't completely forgotten how to do those). I'd recommend it to anyone who's looking for a distracting hour and a bit.

Additional Marshmallows: Unfortunately I had seen a lot of this film previously, the trailer gives some of the best jokes, while my cinema work had me see even more. Trying to see it with fresh eyes isn't easy!

Review: The Bourne Legacy

An almighty cash-in, or for once a clever spin-off from the Bourne trilogy?

I'm afraid mostly the former. Now I was suckered into the trailer for Legacy, and even the tagline: "There was never just one" I couldn't argue against, after all, Matt Damon's Jason Bourne was part of a super soldier program. Plus this film takes place during the events of The Bourne Ultimatum, the third (and most exciting) in the trilogy.
But unfortunately what we get is a pretty big case of "missed opportunity".

Aaron Cross is another man with no past, but unlike Jason he was not part of the Treadstone program but a sister program were participants are trained and enhanced with pills. When Jason Bourne's actions trigger the Treadstone program's assets and agents to be erased, the same must be done for the other programs and Aaron finds himself hunted down. His only ally is a scientist, Rachel Weisz, who is also marked.

The film takes an age to get started. We are subjected to an onslaught of crazy editing and ambiguous character development as the film tries to establish Ultimatum's storyline, Aaron's storyline, the multiple programs, and how these relate at all. When things go wrong, the film has the unsettling sense that something more interesting is happening elsewhere (read: Ultimatum). Most of the dialogue dissolves into "What's going on??" "I don't know anything!" for nearly half the film, poor Edward Norton is given little to do except tell brainless executives over-and-over what's happening.

The action is crammed into the last thirty minutes (yes, I checked the time...) and it is greatly underwhelming. In fact, the whole film is underwhelming. It is terrible because Jeremy Renner plays an interesting variation on the Bourne character and there is potential in some scenes, but the story around him is such a rehash that I couldn't find myself caring.

Not enough synchronicity with the previous films, if establish characters had been used more I may have accepted Legacy as more than just an unnecessary addition. I love the Bourne trilogy, and perhaps Legacy would benefit as part of a film marathon... but I somehow doubt it.

Additional Marshmallows: Massive kudos for using Moby's Extreme Ways at the end credits though, that's the sort of consistency I love.

Review: Brave

Brave is probably one of the simpler outings from Pixar, but it is very easy on the eyes and strikes a nice balance of fun and maturity.

Merida is a Scottish princess whose wild, playful, adventurous nature is completely smothered with her mother's idea of what a princess should be. When their strife gets the better of them, Merida seeks aid from a mysterious old woman living in the forest to "change her mother" and settle the argument.

Bar one exception (cough, Cars 2) Pixar is one studio that consistently excels both in storytelling and visual flare, and one can easily set the bar far higher when judging their products and root out any flaws... Brave is a simple tale compared to the other more "sprawling" stories, and feels like a short hundred minutes, but it makes up for this with having a big heart, immensely likeable characters, beautiful animation and a surprisingly dark, sometimes sinister tone.

That's right, there's a lot of mystery and magic in Brave's story (and in its PR; seriously I knew very little going into it) and some of the younger audience, especially the very little, might find it scary and confusing in an emotional manner. While it isn't as heart-wrenching as UP, its emotional strife is more around family, family conflict and misunderstanding. It is a great twist on what could have been another Disney princess story.

That's all the adult stuff, there is plenty for the kids too! While Brave has some terrific scares, it has some good slapstick fights and chase scenes that don't feel as abrasive as UP's. Merida's three younger brothers are a hoot, and frankly all of the characters are instantly likeable. Yes, the Scottish accents are insanely thick (sometimes deliberately undecipherable!) but as a Scot, I wasn't offended, in fact I was impressed with the vocabulary that Pixar was dishing out. It gave the film a happy-go-lucky, heart-over-mind charm.

Overall, if you don't expect too much, Brave is an excellent family animation with "family" at its core. Simple, but has something for everyone.

Additional Marshmallows: It should be added; this is very much Merida's story, there's no love story crammed in, no charming prince, which was refreshing!

Review: Ted

The not very lovable Ted arrives onto the big screen and is heralded as one of the best comedies of the year. Normally not my sort of film, but there was a lot to get me laughing.

The notorious nature of the hit cartoon series Family Guy is well known to many, it was cancelled and revived twice, and has faced a variety of lawsuits due to its off-colour humour. Now creator Seth MacFarlane has made it to the big screen with the same flare and class... or lack thereof!
On the Christmas of 1985, John (Mark Wahlberg) wished for his teddy bear to come alive, and remarkably, he got his wish! Fast-forward thirty years, John is a layabout underachiever with a big heart, juggling his childish relationship living with Ted (voiced by MacFarlane) and his adult life with his beautiful girlfriend (Mila Kunis). Naturally, vulgar mishaps are abound!

If you are a fan of Family Guy and American Dad, Ted will be for you; it is virtually a live-action interpretation (without the crazy cut-away jokes) most evident with the music which sounds like a direct lift from the shows. It is very much a sitcom scenario, it is a small scale story on the big screen.

The humour is typical MacFarlane, it varies from glorious, to mediocre, to complete miss; some of the jokes are directed towards American audiences and that's to be expected. But it definitely got laughs from me, even if most of them were at Patrick Stewart's narration!

It is quite predictable, but it is entertaining and fun in a stupid way, with plenty of pop culture references you may, or may not, get (lots of 1980s gags). I enjoyed Wahlberg and Kunis' chemistry; the very current trope of a level-headed girlfriend and a loving but gormless, childish guy.

"There is nothing more powerful than a child's wish....
"Except for an Apache Helicopter..."

Review: Real Steel

Real Steel is such a guilty pleasure; it is completely over the top yet loaded with the heartfelt underdog clichés we have come to expect from sport films.

Hugh Jackman plays a retired boxer who now lives in a world where the crowd watch colossal robots battle to destruction in the ring instead. His life is ruinous with a string of bad choices and a selfish attitude, but when he is reunited with his son after his wife dies, courage to fight back and win returns.

There aren't really any surprises here, Real Steel is what it is; a boxing film with giant robots. But there are some unique character developments and subtext because of the robots, as cheesy as it clearly is, the "heart over mind" and "human will over machine precision" is strong, and not something found in Rocky movies.
Plus, the robot designs are pretty awesome! There are several robots in different scenarios, and each one has a unique personality and design to them, from the junkyard fixer-uppers to the high-end (... "definitely Japanese") glossy machines. You could look at them all day, and I will admit unlike Transformers, Real Steel gives you a chance to see them while they are fighting...
I should say though, Atom (the underdog robot Jackman and his son use) is a little too cute looking, it has a strategically placed scratch on its face that makes it look like an innocent smile. It looks completely gormless while fighting.

Another issue I have is the initial meeting of Jackman and his son. While Jackman's performance is great throughout (and so is Dakota Goyo) the kid's custody is decided between going to Italy with his aunt or be with his Dad who works with giant fighting robots (giant fighting robots he is a massive dorky fan of) and he complains. Kid... giant fighting robots, or Italy? I understood his hatred of his dad, but really, you couldn't see the silver lining there?
The other thing was the mother's unknown "off screen cause of death"... it felt no more than a plot device for these characters. It is hard to fit that ex-position realistically to conversations, but knowing what happened to her would have helped.

Predictable but a lot of fun, definitely an entertaining way to spend two hours once it gets going. If you are hesitant to see it... give it a go, it might surprise you.

Review: The Rum Diary

Starts out promising, but quickly becomes a drive-less, uninspiring and confused journey through mediocrity.

The film is In Memory of Hunter S. Thompson, who in film circles is most famous for writing the novel that inspired the trippy Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Johnny Depp, when preparing for his role in that film, found the unpublished manuscript for The Rum Diary in Thompson's basement.
Let's get one thing straight: this is nothing like Fear and Loathing.

The film follows Paul Kemp, a journalist and alcoholic who finds work for a Newspaper in Puerto Rico. His previous work gets the attention of less-than-honourable businessmen who are intent on using his talents to promote a new hotel complex. What follows is a wannabe crusader's attempts to sort his life out while alcohol and one of the businessmen's beautiful women beckon to him.


I don't... know what this film wants to be. It is called a comedy, but there's very little humour in it (except the very occasional quip from Depp or surreal moment, harking back to Fear and Loathing) and the lead characters motivations are often unclear. He appears against the construction of housing and hotels in such a beautiful part of the world, yet shows very little turmoil when he is asked to work for the business. This makes Arron Eckheart's antagonist surprisingly un-antagonistic.
The story telling itself is choppy, as is the editing, and it feels like parts have been left out or sidelined, perhaps for the more tasteful content. The film just sort of "happens", and by the third act you will probably lose all interest in whatever's being said.


Unfortunate it has to be the film "in memory" of Thompson, I imagine Fear and Loathing is a far, far more faithful adaptation. If not that, then certainly more memorable!

Additional Marshmallows: "Why's the Rum gone?"